Thursday, October 16, 2008

Miss Right...

Mr. and Mrs. right-are just that, right for one another.
Some recent factors have played out in my life that have shed some light on the way men think. I'd like to share.
We all have different goals, ambitions, perceptions and desires when it comes to finding a mate. In other words, we each have an agenda. Whether tangible or not,(and it's okay to admit) we have a list of items/qualities we'd like to find in someone. On this list may be certain things that are non-negotiable while others may be a bit less significant. We deem these lists sensible, because we need a partner who facilitates our every desire, right?
Truth be told ladies, we're not the only ones with a list. Mr. Right has constructed a file of his own. And Mr Right, is probably doing a lot more checking off of his own list than we are ours. Face it, men can have Miss Right right in front of them, and give them a kick to the curb if one item doesn't match up. Something as insignificant as "she can't play bass" or "she can't decide where to eat", both of which are actual statements men have relayed to me in the last few days, can actually be the deciding factors in ending a relationship.
The point- having an agenda is not a bad thing. We are human, that's what we do. We find someone with whom we have commonalities. The problem is the substance of that agenda. Is it achievable? Too often they are not. We need to be willing to negotiate our agenda. Conferring with one another and deciding which things you can cut some slack on and be more relaxed about will actually do both Mr. and Miss Right some good. It shows they are willing to communicate. It shows they care about one another enough to let some things slide so that others can grow stronger. Adapting to each other shows that you trust one another. These are things you should be willing to do in order to be potential mates.
Rather than sticking to your dating "resume" try being a bit more flexible, while still not compromising your morals. Be honest with yourself and ask how attainable you are making yourself and then share this article with the Mr Rights out there and hope they do the same.
Good Luck!

1 comment:

Got Bombshell? said...

Grest advice! I know I definitely am guilty of this... I hardly ever actually give anyone a chance. Perhaps why I am still single?